The only real work is to become grass
and grip spindly birches for balance
down a steep bank, to take pictures of ferns,
leaves a rich green, lace-like, dreaming,
condensed out of the spring air, rather than
pushing up through the wet debris of earth.
Fronds press like the open hands
of small women on the rough sides of fallen trees,
their leaves ridged with thin veins
like the tracery of fingerprints.
On my knees, I lift one to see the different,
paler green of the underside and then touch
with a finger the secret joining
where the smaller stems branch.
This feels like a valuable intimacy.
But I disappoint myself, becoming soon bored
with beauty, and drift to the edge of the river,
gray under the day’s clouds. Tough, ordinary grass
blows and rustles beside the water.
Nondescript twigs cross and rub together
on leafless bushes I can’t identify.
The river keeps flowing past.
It is that kind of world. No metaphor,
here at some distance from the ferns --
the grass is grass, the twigs
are twigs, and crows in the distance
gloat over some death they have discovered.
(Yes, it is essential to note death.
And the ferns were not really dreaming --
those organic engines for burning leaf rot.)
I lie lost, watching grass, for I don’t know how long.
on my belly, the coolness of dirt seeping in,
the wind and water moving.
Grass will grow through my hands.
This week at work the back doors have been open to let what ever breeze might come in as the days are getting hot. As I'm trying to work my mind and eyes are focused on the trees and what blue seeps through in the open spaces. The air is filled with cotton flying all about. Some find their way into the shop and I reach out to play with them when I'm suppose to be working. My mind is floating along with the cotton. I want to let grass grow through my hands
ReplyDeleteLiz: i see this scene very clearly. i think you have a poem here -- will you write this poem?
DeleteJuste merveilleux James !
ReplyDeleteJo: merci :-)
DeleteI felt as if I was visiting a museum/art gallery. :)
ReplyDeleteHave a good Sunday James.
Lucia: thank you :-)
DeleteI just read at erin's, the piece about the sweeper of the stairs with a title about no titles, and it felt like just what I have been thinking. Then I come here and feel the same. Why do we get bored, ever, at all? I think it's because we expect that we should do something other than we are doing, with beauty even, as you say. In the case of this piece, your title is essential, part of it, what I come back to when the grass grows through your hands. Being human sometimes feel laborious—too much thought, too many metaphors, too much meaning. And I hear that Thoreau sat in his open doorway on a chair a whole morning, each morning. I remember that often when I chide myself for just sitting.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for this. A connection. A root system.
Ruth: as charles wright says, "don't just do something! sit there...." too often, we substitute action for attention...
Deletei think i am easily bored with obvious and expected beauty. of course the grass and twigs are beautiful, too -- but we go to the forest expecting beauty from the ferns, and find it too easily ... the other beauty takes slowness and contemplation ... (at least for me :-)
the resonance with erin's piece was unplanned, a surprise, an enrichment. we converge, in so many ways, often underground, through the root system, yes :-)
i think of three poems. two by michael ondaatje:
ReplyDeleteTell me
all you know
about bamboo
growing wild, green
growing up into soft arches
in the temple ground
the traditions
driven through hands
through the heart
during torture
and most of all
this
small bamboo pipe
not quite horizontal
that drips
every ten seconds
to a shallow bowl
I love this
being here
not a word
just the faint
fall of liquid
the boom of an iron buddhist bell
in the heart rapid
as ceremonial bamboo
***
and:
The cabin
its tin roof
a wind run radio
catches the noise of the world.
He focuses on the gecko
almost transparent body
how he feels now
everything passing through him like light.
In certain mirrors
he cannot see himself at all.
He is joyous and breaking down.
The tug over the cliff.
What protects him
is the warmth in the sleeve
that is all, really
***
and the third, shyly, is from body
bodies like dandelions pushing. bodies waiting for dandelions to be pushing. bamboo will grow through bodies. there are bodies waiting for bamboo...will anything at all resist this body?
***
only you do not question it. you accept it. it is a truth. grass will grow through your hands.
will we have the patience then to sit and receive? ah, then we will lack the i. it is always this which gets in the way, always this which is the doorway to our receiving.
what rounds this out for me is your finding the salamander (not a gecko) in the snow.
i like what ruth points to, our boredom even with beauty, of course, you recognizing and pointing to it first. who are we to ever be without awe? blind, perhaps.
i revel in your voice. i revel in your poetry, in your sight, in your being.
xo
erin
erin: you give me too much here for me to respond in any adequate way :-) thank you for the poems. thank you most for the words from body -- i had not realized (or remembered) how close we were on this -- but of course, as i mention to ruth, this communication happens through the root system :-)
ReplyDeleteit is, you remind me, a poem about the body becoming continuous with the world, once the resisting ego somehow manages to quieten for a time. such moments are possible, rare of they might be. i think we have known them together :-)
what a beauty of a title! and I love this image so very much - "Fronds press like the open hands
ReplyDeleteof small women on the rough sides of fallen trees". lovely to hear you read, such a soft poem and yet finishes with a kind of violence. nicely done!
Marion: it is a kind of violence -- and yet i hope it is a necessary, accepted violence, a dissolution ...
ReplyDelete